By Aaron W. Hughey
This is for the new professionals out there; i.e., those among us who are just beginning what we all hope will be a long and exciting adventure in student affairs.
One of the biggest challenges new professionals often face is learning to decipher the language used by senior professionals. So, to help even out the learning curve for the most recent additions to our ranks, I thought a translation guide might be helpful.
As you read this, see how many of these phrases you have heard — and naively thought you understood what the senior professional was actually saying.
A senior professional says during an interview: “We are looking for innovative, imaginative free-thinkers to come in and shake things up.”
Translation: “We think things are pretty good just the way they are, so when you get here, keep your new ideas to yourself.”
Senior professionals love to lament the lack of originality and fresh perspectives among their staff members. But they also love to asphyxiate creativity at every available opportunity.
A senior professional says: “I’ll put this on my list.”
Translation: “And I’ll get to it as soon as the temperature in hell drops to 32 degrees Fahrenheit.”
Values determine priorities; priorities determine what gets done. Before you make any suggestion, try to get a handle on the senior professional’s priorities.
A senior professional encourages you to: “Think outside the box.”
Translation: “But make sure you stay well within mine.”
Very few senior professionals really want you to think outside their box; if you do, your career could have a limited shelf life. You’ve been warned.
A senior professional says: “I’m not sure this is the direction we need to move in at the current moment.”
Translation: “If you do this, start updating your resume.”
Being enigmatic and indirect is one of the defining characteristics of a successful senior professional.
A senior professional says: “Don’t bring me problems, bring me solutions.”
Translation: “I don’t have a clue what to do or I would provide leadership in this situation.”
When in doubt, kill the messenger. Throwing a new professional into the deep end of the pool in order to teach them how to swim is not “developmental.” The Peter Principle is alive and well in student affairs.
A senior professional asks: “What are our benchmark institutions doing?”
Translation: “We’re obviously too stupid to be on the cutting edge of anything, so let’s see what’s already being done and just copy that.”
Making real improvements takes initiative, resourcefulness, and intelligence – qualities that have usually beaten out of those who have successfully worked their way up the career ladder.
A senior student affairs professional says: “I know.”
Translation: “I don’t have a clue, but I don’t want to be bothered about this right now… or ever.”
Senior professionals don’t like to be overtly rude; they typically prefer the covert route.
A senior professional says: “We need to engage our students more.”
Translation: “We may be incompetent, but we can use the appropriate jargon to make it seem like we know what we are doing.”
Good student affairs professionals were engaging students long before the term was invented or became cool. It’s almost an oxymoron these days.
A senior professional responds to an e-mail you sent with: “Thanks for sharing.”
Translation: “I couldn’t care less about what you just sent me. Now get back to work.”
Senior professionals hate to be bothered with relevant information, empirical evidence, or informed commentary. Don’t try to enlighten them, they just get annoyed.
A senior professional says: “We need to build this into our strategic plan.”
Translation: “Maybe we can talk this to death so we won’t have to do anything.”
It’s much easier to talk about doing something than actually doing it. The latter requires effort.
A senior professional says: “We need to move a little slower on this” or “Let’s not rush into anything.”
Translation: “We are only interested in looking like we are doing something.”
Avoiding the appearance of failure means everything to senior professionals. It is better to never have loved at all than to have loved and lost.
I’m sure many of you can provide examples of other phrases that need to be similarly decoded for our junior colleagues. Please feel free to pass those along and I’ll do my best to illuminate their real meaning.
Just remember, “I’m from the government and I’m here to help.”
{ 17 comments… read them below or add one }
“I like to keep my options open” might mean “I dont want to agree to anything that would obligate me to take action.”
“Let us not focus on the negative” might mean “stop pointing out my mistakes.”
“Everyone should be allowed to find their passion and follow it” might mean “If I hold you to standards then you might hold me to standards.”
“I prefer a hands off style of leadership” might mean “I’m too busy making my money to worry about what you are doing.”
I appreciate these additions, Karl. I think our profession has an Orwellian dimension to it – at least that’s the impression I had at ACPA. Doublespeak is alive and well in student affairs.
Some of these are pretty funny, even true. It’s also important for young professionals to not be automatic cynics and think senior leaders are always clueless.
Agreed (for the most part). I don’t see myself as cynical and I certainly don’t want our new professionals to ever be ‘automatic’ in their assessment of senior professionals. As is always the case, there are exceptional senior professionals in the field you have good hearts and competencies to match. There are others, however, who many of these translations fit perfectly and those entering the field need to be aware of that reality. I do think it is very important that new professionals realize that experience does not necessarily translate into wisdom and that there is a large segment of senior leadership who are simply not interesting in doing much beyond the status quo — and/or think that any progress should proceed as a snail’s pace. I know several senior professionals who take a kind of delight in crushing the enthusiasm of their junior staff members under the guise of “developing” them. I advise all our students to 1) Think for themselves, 2) Speak their truths, and 3) Live out loud. Any senior professional who doesn’t ‘automatically’ support these tenets (in word and action) is suspect in my book. Student affairs desperately needs more creative, free-thinkers — not drones who are interested in carrying on in the footsteps of those who are out of touch with current realities. The world is fundamentally changing; we have to change with it.
While so many of the examples in this post resonate with my own experiences with certain individuals, I do think that we have to be careful about polarization. We have to teach from the middle. This type of post will undoubtedly get a lot of clicks and it probably felt good to write, but what’s the overall purpose? Our profession (and really, it’s not just SA) loves hierarchy, dualistic thinking, and power just as much as the next gig. We have to try to be better stewards of our position. Write for change and educate those who gravitate towards the ends into seeing something closer to the middle. ~e
There is a reason the examples resonate with you, me and more of our colleagues than we realize. The purpose of the article was to educate and generate a much-needed open dialogue on the politics our graduates are often ill prepared to negotiate. I always see the glass as half full and I am optimistic about our profession and the future. But I am not going to present a view of our profession – and especially more than a few of our senior professionals – that is sanitized or politically correct. Those who are bothered by the column need to be. The truth is that we need to be more purposeful in encouraging everyone in our field to challenge the status quo constantly and enthusiastically. We need to actively recruit more hell raisers. Then again, that’s just my opinion; I could be wrong.
I agree with Eric and Brian. The content here makes senior student affairs professionals into unfair stereotypes as well, not to mention the fact that it doesn’t do any favors for keeping talented newcomers interested in the occupation.
I find this column mean-spirited, and believe it trivializes the very real and person-specific issues with leadership in student affairs. New professionals are not passive recipients of a malicious regime; we do not do tem favors when we teach them to be. Let’s use the precious time we have with them in graduate education to be strategic arbiters of their own style and strengths.
Something is happening here, but you don’t know what it is, do you, Mister Jones ?
Thankfully, this has not been my experience with SSAO’s at what is now 5 institutions. I have had the pleasure to work under inspiring leaders in student affairs and on campus. I agree with Eric about his notion of teaching from the middle. I have found that new professionals often do not have the direct access to or day to day interaction with the SSAO anyway. For them, the reality is that they will likely interact with great “middle” seasoned professionals and professionals who are aspiring for upper level positions. These folks can make or break a new professionals experience/career. I firmly believe in focusing on this middle group to mentor new professionals and to help guide them through potential professional pitfalls. I have had a few “woodshed” talk in my day that at the time was not pleasurable but made me a better professional over time.
There is a fine line between mentoring and indoctrination. Again, we desperately need professionals who are not afraid to tell the emperor she has no clothes. There is a lot more at stake here than individual careers. I want to be associated with a profession that is more interested in changing the world than perpetuating a culture where people are rewarded for doing what they are told and not causing headaches for the leadership. There are some excellent senior professionals out there. There are also several who are captured perfectly by these “translations.” We need to make sure new professionals go into this field with their eyes open. We have to teach them the realities they very likely will encounter during their careers – the good, the bad and the ugly.
Ah yes, another example of a young practitioner who couldn’t cut the mustard so he took the faculty route. It’s sad to see the bias teaching our new professionals in the classroom.
Yep. I took the “easy” route. And we get summers off, too.
I found it to be humorous. Of course not all senior SA professionals act this way. Take it for what it is worth – not a critical thinking piece, but a light hearted look at glitches that many student affairs professionals experience. if you have never worked at a dysfuncation institution, in a dysfunctional department or be caught in higher ed ‘red tape’ as a student affairs professional… consider yourself lucky! And if you don’t have a sense of humor … you will never survive in student affairs.. and if you do survive, you will be miserable without the ability to just laugh as something lighthearted like this.
Thanks for your insightful comments here. I have a small poster on my office wall that reads “Never lose your sense of humor.” Apparently I need to make copies for some folks…
The piece is serving it’s intended purpose. One of my mentors used to have a saying; without getting into specifics, it involved what you could do if you can’t take a joke. Regardless, all of the “translations” have their basis in reality and new professionals need a ‘heads up’ that not everyone in a senior level position can be taken at face value. I’ve personally seen several new professionals naively take admonitions to “tell me what you really think” seriously and suffer the consequences when they do just that. The piece also resonates with many new professionals, judging by the numerous examples that continue to fill my inbox. The sequel is already in the works. Stay tuned.
Aaron,
Please please please please write for us. Please.